Thursday, November 06, 2008

Scapegoating: Stop blaming and get to action

So, so much has happened since I last updated this blog and I will be discussing my life over the past few months, but right now I need to get this off my chest. Here goes:

Black people are not the reason that Proposition 8 passed in California.

For those that don’t know Prop 8 is a measure that calls for a constitutional amendment to California’s constitution. It would declare marriage to be between one man and one woman. In May 2008, the California State Supreme court ruled that gay and lesbian people have the right to marry under the California constitution, which does not prevent discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. Of course this put all the right wingers into an uproar, and with millions upon millions of dollars (mostly contributions from entities outside of California) Prop 8 was put on the November 2008 ballot.

Much to the surprise of people all over the state of California, Prop 8 passed. In California, marriage is now defined as being only between one man and one woman. In the six months since the state supreme court ruled in favor of same sex marriage, over 18,000 gay and lesbian couples have exercised their constitutional right to marry the person of their choosing. With the passage of Prop 8, the validity of those marriages are now in question.

So what does this have to do with Black folk, you ask? In case you’ve been living under a rock on Pluto and hadn’t heard, for the first time in history the United States a major political ticket had a viable African American candidate running for President of the United States, Senator Barack Obama. I think the prospect of 1). George W. Bush out office and 2) having a president who was Black, energize black folks and they got out to vote in numbers not seen in years. Even though Barack Obama was not my first choice for president (go Dennis Kucinich) he has qualities and ideas that made me proud to cast a vote for him when November 4, 2008 came around.

Back to Prop 8 & black folk. It is no secret that the overwhelming majority of Black folks hold religion in high esteem. I’m sure the reasons behind that are for another post. I think for a lot of black folk homosexuality and religion are diametrically opposed. In the minds of many (NOT ALL), homosexuality is a downright sin and abomination. So it would only be natural and morally right (in their minds) to vote to pass a measure that would ban same sex marriage. Homosexuality goes against their religious beliefs. It doesn’t matter that what they were voting for would strip a segment of the population (a segment that includes other black folk and racial minorities) of their civil rights. It didn’t matter that they were voting to write discrimination into the state constitution, the same constitution that not too long ago blatantly discriminated against African Americans. It didn’t matter that they were using the same agreements against gay marriage that were used against interracial at one time in American history. All that matter was homosexuality is a sin. So while many black folk were casting their ballots for the man who would become our 44th president, they also cast a vote to ban marriage for same sex couples.

Now, if I didn’t know better, I would understand why so many gay (white) people are up in arms and blaming African Americans for the passing of Proposition 8. But, I do know better. I know that black folk make up 6% of the California population. Even if all black folk in California had voted Yes on 8, it still would have passed. I know that it was not African Americans who put proposition 8 on the California ballot. I know that it was not black folks who funneled millions upon millions upon millions of dollars into the state of California to fund the Yes on 8 campaign. If we’re going to play the blame game, start with the following:

Knights of Columbus gave $1,000,000 to help pass Proposition 8

The Mormon Church (not always the biggest supporter of Black folk) and other ultra conservative religious organizations raised millions to help pass Proposition 8.

No on 8 campaign. Why them? Because they ran, to put it blatantly and in layman’s terms, a punk ass ineffectual oppositional campaign. Did you see the commercials on TV? While the Yes on 8 was running ads full of blatant lies about schools and children

No on 8 countered back with timid ads like these

and don't forget this one

While I understand it’s important to get the message out anyway you can and a no vote is a no vote, where was the outrage on No on 8’s part? Hell, where are all the gay people and couples that this evil law is going to affect? Where was the outreach to communities of color? Where was the outreach to gay, lesbian, bisexual people of color? I can’t tell you how many times I turned on black Bay Area radio stations and heard Yes on 8 advertisements. Not once did I hear No on 8 on any of the stations that predominately catered to African Americans, but I sure as hell heard them on them on the one station in the bay area that specifically caters to young white gays (a station that I do enjoy listening to everyday, by the way). Why are we preaching to the choir?

Is there homophobia in the Black community? YES!!!! There is also homophobia in the Latino communities, there is homophobia in Asian communities, and there is homophobia in white communities. There is homophobia in all communities so why, all of sudden, is it the fault of black folks that Prop 8 failed?

So, now that Proposition 8, the ban on same sex marriages, has passed and the legal battles are now going to be fought, what happens next? For me, it just leaves more questions. When are we gay people going to stop marching on the streets of the Castro district and West Hollywood and start marching up and down the streets where those who hate gays live? When are white gays going to start actively reaching out to people of color in the fight to end discrimination? When are gay, lesbian, and bisexual people of color going to finally come out, stand up, and demand our place at the table in our communities of color and in the gay community at large?

- Strange ((^_~))

Thursday, April 10, 2008

The Ex-wife, the Paramour, and me

Oh what a weekend I had. My new paramour (who shall from now on be known only as Lady D) finally met the ex-wife, Shawty Le Red. It went well. We, along with Cranky Librarian, all had brunch with a group of other queer people of color and then went to a museum. Good times were had by all, for the most part. There was one crunchy episode. More to possibly come if I feel like it.

I didn’t feel funny at all about being all kissy kissy and affectionate with Lady D around Shawty Le Red. I really can’t keep my hands off Lady D. She’s hot!!! What can I say.

-Strange ((^_~))

Monday, March 24, 2008

Ain’t nothing wrong with a lil bump and grind

Now that my unofficial celibacy has ended I realized something. While I’ve got a kinky side to me and like spanking and other forms of BDSM, a good old fashion bump and grind always bring to me the promise land.

Today’s word of the day girls and boys: tribadism.

- Strange ((^_~))

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Back in the Game

So, it would appear that everyone’s favorite strangelilblackgrl is back in the sex having game. After 457 days of sex with my right hand and my dirty imagination, I have gotten laid.


After so much time away from the game, I find that I really don’t know what I’m doing anymore. My new paramour is actually quite shy and very quiet. I’m finding that I’m having to be the aggressor...which I kinda like. ::insert silly giggle here:: If only I can find a way to make my move so that things get rolling before 10, 11 o’clock at night. I got to work in the morning and staying up until 2 f*cking on a weekday is not conducive to me getting out of bed on time.

Anyway, back to me having forgotting everything about pleasing a woman. After being rejected so many times by the ex-wife, my confidence has definitely taking a hit. Sex was the one thing I knew I was good at (ask all the other broads who aren’t ex-wives). Now I finding myself having conversations in my head while I’m in the middle of the act. It’s crazy.

- Strange ((^_~))

Thursday, March 06, 2008

My Jesus Year

Today marks the anniversary of my 33rd year on this planet. They call your 33rd year your Jesus year. It's the year where you either get off your ass and do something with your life or just forget about it.

I started the morning with a headache, followed by damn near crying a good portion of the morning while sitting at my desk at work, to feeling so so for the rest of the day. By the time I left work, my allergies had started to act up, but I was feeling a bit better. I went out to dinner with my best friend, the Cranky Librarian, and my ex-wife, Shawty Le Red. Overall it today was a good day.

I think I was missing my mother today. Birthday’s have never really matter too much since she died almost 8 years ago. It’s hard to believe it’s been 8 years. I recognize how much I’ve changed, but how I’ve stayed stagnant at the same time. I’m now 33 and I’m nowhere where I thought I would be 8 years ago. I still have no idea what I’m supposed to be doing with my life. I’m just kind of existing, working at a job that I’m bored with and is giving me carpal tunnel (the excessive masturbation problem doesn’t help either), and just not really enjoying life.

So, here in my Jesus year (the year to do or die) these are my goals:

1. Find a job that I enjoy and that pays me an adult wage.
2. Get back into my writing. I have all these ideas, characters, and scenarios in my head.
3. Stop living in my head and daydreaming so much.
4. Finally start that T-shirt/bumpersticker business I’ve been wanting to do for years
5. Get laid…by someone other than myself.
6. Drop some of the pounds cause my stomach should not be bigger than my boobs... and I’ve got big boobs. The Cranky Librarian describes them as pendulous.

That’s a pretty good start.

-Strange ((^_~))


I’ve never been good at keeping a diary or a journal and it appears this whole blogging thing ain’t much different. So here’s what’s been going on since I last posted, October 2007

I carried a full load during the Fall semester of 2007, 5 classes, for a total of 15 units. I got 3 A’s and 2 B’s and continue to do the cabbage in celebration of my good grades. Did I mention I was also working fulltime while busting my non-existence ass for those grades?

I found a new apartment, in the Lake Merritt area, near the end of December. I finally got fed up with my ghetto neighbors at my old apartment in the Fruitvale district. Apparently that chick, who was always yelling at her poor child, didn’t live in the apartment next to me. She lived in a downstairs apartment! For her to be yelling that loud to the point where I could make out every curse word, and not be living right next door, was sad and appalling.

I’m still trying to decide on my new Lake Merritt apartment. I love that I’m so close to the Lake and it’s going to be awesome once the weather warms up, but I’m not quite sure about the apartment itself. The property management company damn near asked for everything except my DNA when I submitted my application, but I quickly realized the apartment doesn’t quite live up to standards. For starters, there was the light issue in the bathroom on my very first night. I’m no rocket scientist but I’m pretty sure water in an electrical outlet is not a good idea. The light bulb blew out and when I went to change the light I discovered that the light fixture was full of water. It was coming from the dude upstairs (who I will discuss later). That was issue one.

Second issue happened just a few weeks ago. I left my apartment at 11am, I got back at 12:25pm. An hour and 25 minutes. The kitchen sink somehow mysteriously backed up and a good chunk of the carpet was soaked through. I still haven’t been able to figure that one out.

Third issue. My upstairs neighbor. I don’t know about you, but I usually tend to be asleep at 3 in the morning. Why is this old man making so much noise? Who the hell is hammering at 3 in the morning? And how thin do walls have to be to actually be able to hear old dude snoring. SNORING!!!! I can hear him snoring...when he’s not building whatever it is it sounds like he’s building.

I’m pretty sure I’ll be apartment hunting again when the semester is over. I want to stay back the lake though. Hell if I can find another apartment on the same damn street that would be great!!

Love/Sex Life
Sex? Uh…what’s that? You think I was trying to get permission to perform brain surgery. I’m just trying to get laid with no luck. Whoever said it was easier for women to get laid than men must have been talking about straight women. I’m convinced that there are no normal, sexually secure, sane, regular women of color left in the Bay Area.


-Strange ((^_~))